What does David Cameron believe in?

In recent weeks, newspapers and other media outlets have been informing their readers/viewers of some of the things Jeremy Corbyn believes in. The level of untruth and spin in such lists varies depending on the political opinion of the outlet or individual reporter.

So in the interests of balance, I thought I would write a list of some of the things David Cameron believes in. This is a work in progress but these are the things I thought of whilst rocking my baby back to sleep in the early hours:

• Supporting Rebecca Brooks who can't be the "I knew nothing" incompetent that her defence suggested because she's just been rehired
• Having dinners with private company bosses to discuss political issues which affect their businesses
• Not meeting with unions who represent millions of workers
• Receiving huge donations from people and companies who then benefit from his policies
• Peerages for MPs who failed or worse, were corrupt
• Giving honours to Tory party donors
• Waving cash in the faces of staff and trashing restaurants (bullingdon club days)
• Supporting Aston Villa - or is it West Ham?
• Supporting Israel as they continue to mercilessly destroy the Gaza strip
• Being the greenest government ever. No wait, sorry: cutting the green crap
• Walking away at the end of a statement so that journalists can't ask questions
• Making the poorest and most vulnerable pay for the mistakes of the richest with welfare cuts
• Cutting more funding to councils in poor areas than affluent areas
• Giving tax breaks to the wealthiest in the country
• Handing over huge subsidies to big private sector profiteers
• Doing nothing about tax avoidance
• Making money from tax avoidance (his Dad's company made a fortune which lucky Dave and his siblings have inherited)
• Fighting against the EU on behalf of his chums in the city
• Letting Quadrilla frack under YOUR house
• Signing a trade deal (TTIP) that will allow private companies to sue governments if their policies harm their potential profits: e.g. the NHS for harming the profitability of private healthcare providers
• Forcing the BBC to pay for free licence fees for OAPs whilst ensuring the big private energy companies still get the winter fuel allowance paid for by taxpayers
• Shrinking the BBC whilst allowing Murdoch to increase his UK media monopoly
• Selling off state assets on the cheap to his chums and party donors e.g. Royal Mail and RBS
• Selling arms to Saudi Arabia who fund ISIS
• Unfair legal system: the Tories have crushed legal aid so now people can only get legal representation if they can afford to pay for it, meaning if they are unfairly dismissed or suffer due to their employers' negligence, it's just tough